Let's say you have a date with your crush. You have showered, picked out an outfit, double-checked the time and place where you two are supposed to meet, and now you're ready to go. Are you really, though? Did you stop for one moment to think about possible topics to discuss?
In his or her presence, your mind might go blank because you're so nervous. Not everyone is a naturally good talker when it comes to dating, so it would be a great idea to think of a few things to talk about with your crush. There's a whole world waiting to be discovered inside this human, so make sure you don't lose time by talking about meaningless or negative things.
16 Things to Talk About With Your Crush
Here are a few topic ideas to help you break the ice and get to know your crush better. They range from fun to serious, so choose wisely according to your mood and relationship status.
1. Talking about common friends could break the ice
If you know little to nothing about your crush, then you can start by talking about the people you both know. Questions such as "How long have you known Sandra?" or, "Is Jerry in trouble again?" could lead to a light and enjoyable conversation.
Your friends are a sort of common ground that's initially welcome as a conversation starter. You might laugh together about what Jerry did or share the same opinion about his actions.
2. Ask your crush about his or her idea of fun
Before things get serious between you two, you can talk about fun stuff. It would be nice for you to find out what your crush's idea of fun is. Maybe she is the type of person who likes clubbing and techno music, and you're a bit of a party freak yourself.
This topic could lead to sharing experiences when you and your crush had a lot of fun. Talking about enjoyable things and remembering fun times is known to lift one's mood.
3. Take interest in your crush's job
Your crush's job might not highlight his or her personality, but talking about it is quite important. Besides taking an obvious interest in what he or she does, you can find out details about responsibility levels, your schedules, and work type. Before you know it, your mind will assess whether a possible relationship could work around it.
You should also talk about what you do at work and what you like and don't like about it.
4. Ask about his or her professional goals
A very natural follow-up topic could be professional goals. Your crush could be perfectly happy at his or her current workplace or not so much. Maybe she's working hard as a waitress to pay for business school. Perhaps he is a DJ who only works during the night, and he's not planning on changing a thing.
You are not boring if you try to talk about work. It can say a lot of things about people. An ambitious guy or girl who has a 5-year life plan is very different from a less-organized person with less-grandiose future plans.
5. Bring up the topic of hobbies
Among the most interesting things to talk about with your crush are his or her hobbies. There are rare cases when a person doesn't have hobbies. However, if this is your crush's case, then you should talk about your hobbies. Who knows, maybe he or she will take an interest in what you like to do and want to try it out.
A person's hobby says more about his or her personality than a job, for example. A job could be something we do because we want to be financially independent. Sometimes, it doesn't have to be the passion of our lives.
6. Talk about music and everything concerning it
When I was a teenager, I used to think that my boyfriend and I should have the same taste in music. How else would we go to the same concerts, right? Things have changed since, and now I find it fascinating to discover other music genres.
It's great when you and your crush are into the same type of music, because that is something you both have in common. However, you should also welcome novelty. You never know where you'll discover your next favorite band, singer, or DJ.
7. Favorite movies and TV series are fun to talk about
Break that moment of silence by asking your crush about his or her favorite movies and TV series. Use this as an excuse to ask them out to see a movie or to invite them over to watch one. You'll be binging on them together and enjoying each other's company in no time.
After you see a movie or a TV show together, you'll have new things to talk about. You can share opinions and make plans to watch the sequels.
8. Find out if people still read books
These days, reading books is not among the most popular individual activities. Even so, you might be surprised to learn about an underrated sci-fi book that could actually arouse your interest.
Or, perhaps you've been dying to share your thoughts about a post-apocalyptic drama you've just read. You never know, so give it a try.
9. Ask about your crush's traveling goals
Examples of other things to talk about in a relationship are past travel experiences, future travel plans, and the ultimate travel destination. Fascinate your crush by telling him or her about all the wonderful places you've already seen. Increase his or her enthusiasm level for a travel destination you know many things about.
Also, don't forget to listen. You don't want to miss important details that will eventually come up again in your conversations.
If it's possible and your relationship is serious enough for you to travel together, then you can use this chance to make plans or see how he or she would react to such an activity as a couple.
10. Take interest in his or her family
Family is a sensitive topic for most of us, so approach it carefully. Casually ask your crush if he or she has any siblings. Don't hesitate to ask about family values either. A person who grew up in a dysfunctional family might not want to build one of their own.
Conversely, if your crush has a very good relationship with his or her family, then you might have to consider meeting them sooner than you expected. So, it's always nice to ask and see where you stand.
11. Seek advice from him or her
Once you feel closer to your crush, you could ask for advice. Any dilemma which you can't figure out on your own is good. Or, you might need a second opinion on something that's been bugging you. In this way, you not only show that you care about what he or she thinks, but you also confide in him or her.
12. Approach the topic of the ideal relationship
You should know by now how much you two like each other and whether you'd like to take your relationship further. Share your vision about the type of relationship you'd like to have and ask about his or hers. Be careful, however, not to talk about such important love topics too soon.
13. Make future plans together
One subtle way to find out how your crush sees your future together is to try and make plans. Invite him or her to go to the zoo two weeks from now and analyze his or her reaction. Or, if popular holidays such as Christmas or spring break are approaching, attempt to plan something to do together.
Making plans means you two have a stable relationship, and it expresses your desire to spend even more time together and strengthen your bond.
14. Share a secret or a hidden thought
Speaking of strengthening the bond with your crush, what you can do to further achieve it is to share a secret or hidden thought. By doing so, you give proof of trust. You make your crush feel like a more important part of your life. If the feeling is mutual, then he or she might treat you with spicy details of his or her life as well.
15. Ask what annoys him or her
Since you would never want to annoy your crush and are focused on deepening your connection, you should ask what irritates them or makes him or her angry. In return, you should also let him or her know what makes you snap.
This is not the most enjoyable topic, we know, but it's a constructive way to learn about each other.
16. Talk about sex like adults
Don't be one of those couples who don't talk about sex. Sex is such a complex and interesting topic to talk about! Not all love topics should involve sex, but it wouldn't do you any harm to ask a few dirty questions.
Try questions such as these: "Do you ever fantasize about me?"; "Do you like to be touched gently, or do you prefer a firmer touch?"; "What do you think about oral sex?"
Summary
The process of getting to know someone is exciting and interesting. You can talk about the lightest of topics or dive deep into the future of your relationship. It's up to you to decide how slow you want to take things or how open you'll be at the beginning. Enjoy the quality time with your crush!