How to Lose Feelings for Someone - Unlearning Love When It’s Unrequited

You have a crush on someone and you are well aware that he or she doesn't feel the same for you. No matter how hard you try, the result won't meet your expectations. We agree that true love is worth fighting for, but not when it's unrequited. In this case, you'd be better off if you tried to accept reality, give yourself time to move on, and focus on other enjoyable things in life. It might also be good to physically distance yourself from your crush.

Since you can't make anyone love you back, the best thing you can do for yourself right now is learn how to lose feelings for someone and regain control over your happiness.

1. Stop living in your head and accept the reality

Total honesty is required in the process of learning how to overcome feelings of love. It's time to stop tricking yourself by thinking that, someday, your crush will love you back. You deserve to be happy and loved right now, not sometime in the future.

Resist the urge to try and win them over. Your crush probably doesn't want to hurt you, but they might have to if you constantly keep trying. It's pointless to confess your love over and over hoping for a different reaction. You two might be the perfect pair in your head, but what happens in reality is different.

2. Make a list of your crush's shortcomings

Love makes us see things through rose-colored glasses, so it always blinds us to some degree. What this truly means is that we stop thinking objectively. Is this guy or girl truly that awesome that you have to drown yourself in sorrow? Find out for yourself! Make a list of your crush's shortcomings.

It is scientifically proven that it helps a lot to think about someone's flaws in order to deal with the rejection coming from them.

3. Stop talking to and about your crush

In case you are truly determined to proceed with the needed steps, begin by not talking to or about this special someone. No one is asking you to forget them. In fact, it's not even possible. So, don't try to forget. Wiping a loved one from your mind is not even indicated. This is because you will not only erase him or her, but also your expectations, plans, and hopes.

Physically distance yourself from this person and stay away from him or her even on social media. It's better to unfriend your crush instead of stalking them. If you happen to go to the same classes or if you are work colleagues, then simply avoid any form of contact. It will be difficult at first, but we assure you that it will get easier with each passing day.

4. Spend your time in the best way possible

It's okay to give yourself time to cope with what's happening to you, but not too much time. Move on and spend your time in a constructive way. Learn how to take advantage of what life has to offer. Do anything that makes you feel better about yourself. Pick up from where you left off before your entire being was absorbed by your feelings. Keep yourself busy, stay active, and try to enjoy the little things. Mimic the type of happiness you strive for until it becomes real.

For example, you could go shopping to renew your wardrobe, try another hairstyle, play sports, visit art exhibitions, join a class, volunteer, explore the quaint places your town has to offer, and so on.

5. Remember that other people exist and that they can make you happy

How to lose feelings for someone fast? Reconnect with your friends, make new friends, and enjoy the company of your family. Although what you desire now is for your crush to love you, his or her feelings for you should not be the only source of happiness. You can find happiness in the presence of other people as well.

In case your crush is part of your friend group, try to get in touch with other acquaintances. It will feel like a breeze to hang out with a person outside your regular circle. In addition, you will most probably meet new people who might surprise you.

6. Seek reasons to laugh

While going through a heartbreak, the last thing you want to do is look up funny kitten videos online. But guess what? Laughter helps us deal with pain more easily and it releases endorphins, which are chemicals that alter our mood for the better.

Distract yourself by searching for funny videos, jokes, and comedies (not romantic comedies), or even attend a stand-up show. Having a laugh with your friends over a glass of wine also counts!

7. Don't expect overnight results

You didn't fall in love overnight and you will not fall out of love overnight either. Just as you have to accept that your love is unrequited, you must also accept that you can't force yourself to feel better in too little time.

"How long will it take?" you might ask. Unfortunately, we don't know. It's different for everyone. It depends on how intense your feelings are, how good you are at motivating yourself, and whether you allow yourself to feel empowered by your qualities or you sink into a lake of insecurities.

8. Redecorate your living space

Take your determination to unlearn love as a new beginning; a starting point from which you will become a better you, welcome new people in your life, and do what you like. So, how about giving your living space a fresh face as well?

Psychologists recommend moving the furniture a little bit and trying DIY projects not only to create a better living space for yourself, but also to remove bad memories and negative energies. A new setting will make you feel revived and challenge you to come up with ideas, thus taking your mind off "you know who."

9. Don't switch from one obsession to another

Believe it or not, there's a certain degree of obsession when it comes to love too. Especially if it's unrequited, it pushes us to think about a certain person, a moment, or even a line, over and over again. So, it's up to you to reconfigure the way your brain works by not feeding it the same patterns. In other words, we don't recommend getting involved with someone else until you get over your crush.

As crushing as it may be right now, the feeling of unrequited love will pass. It's not only a matter of time. It also depends on what you do. Remember that you are not the problem, but that the solution to this whole situation is in you.

Daniela
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