It's inevitable for all of us to go through hard times in life. It's also hard to watch your loved ones go through difficulties. During these times it's normal to feel helpless and struggle to find the words to say that will give them some comfort.
Men deal with emotional stress differently from women, so your first instinct might not be as helpful as you would hope. Follow the advice below to learn how to cheer up your boyfriend.
1. Give him space to digest the bad news on his own
In many cases, the best way to help the men in your life get through a tough time is to leave them alone for a while. Unlike most women, when men are dealing with something that is difficult or emotional, they tend to completely shut down communication with the people around them. They internalize the pain until they feel that they can control their emotions. If you keep pestering them to talk about their feelings when they are not ready, you'll probably just upset them even more or push them away. Give them the space to heal on their own.
Way to cheer him up: While he's going through his quiet time and you're giving him space, try to stay lighthearted and available. If you do speak with him, try to avoid any sensitive subjects. You can distract him with some gossip from work or something you saw on TV.
2. Talk to him about it
When he's ready to talk, you'll know. Allow him to open up and share his problem in his own time. Try to spend more time listening than speaking, as simply getting someone to talk about what they are experiencing will help them cope better.
Way to cheer him up: You can offer advice if you have had the same or similar experience. He will appreciate any tips you might have. Even if your advice is not for his situation, your support will still be a great comfort for him. Admit that you don't know what to say to help him, but tell him that you know that he'll be able to get through this and that you'll always be there for him.
3. Get some fresh air
If you're with your boyfriend while he's upset, then going outside and getting some fresh air might help to calm him down.
Ways to cheer him up: There are many ways to cheer up your boyfriend by taking him outside. Go for a long walk in a park or somewhere with lots of green grass and red flowers. You could also take him to a bar or restaurant that has an outdoor seating area or on a long drive. The fresh air, the people, and the sights all around will help him put things into perspective and stop him from focusing on his feelings too much.
4. Inspire him with some real-life examples
If you know of or have heard about anyone who went through a similar situation, telling them about someone else's success story might be a comfort to them.
Ways to cheer him up: If you can't inspire him with examples of other people, then tell him about his own ability to cope well in difficult circumstances. Remind him of some of the challenges he has already overcome and let him know that you believe in him and that he'll be fine in time.
5. Do his favorite things together
Whether he enjoys going out or staying in, socializing or playing computer games, allowing him to spend time doing his favorite things will distract him from the stress of what he's going through.
Ways to cheer him up: It's not so much that you're pretending the bad things are not happening; you are just choosing to focus on something else. Talk about other things, crack jokes, and try to make him laugh. Even if you're not funny at all, he'll appreciate your effort.
6. Plan a delicious dinner for him
If you have no idea how to cheer up your boyfriend, then preparing your boyfriend's favorite food is one of the best ways to make him smile, no matter what he might be going through.
Ways to cheer him up: Cooking for him is a good idea even if the food you cook is something simple. Another good idea would be to take him out to a great restaurant. When you go out, keep your conversation light and cheerful, but be prepared to listen if he feels like talking about anything more serious.
7. Give him a present
This not only works really well to cheer up children, but it also works for men. A thoughtful gift will give him an injection of positive energy that can help to pull him out of his funk.
Way to cheer him up: Buy your boyfriend a new game for his Playstation or a ticket for a show you know he'll love. Hopefully opening the gift and using it will allow him to stop thinking about the torturous thoughts he has going on in his mind.
8. A movie night
If you need to know how to cheer up boyfriend on a budget, a movie night will do the job. Movies provide a temporary escape from reality. Your boyfriend will be able to spend an hour or two (or more if you choose something with sequels) not thinking about his problem.
Way to cheer him up: You'll definitely need to choose something he'll enjoy, so no chick-flicks or romcoms (unless he's into that kind of thing). Get properly stocked up with his favorite snacks and make sure that the movie you choose has nothing to do with the situation he's dealing with himself.
9. Play a sport together
When most people are upset about something, they usually want to mope around and wallow in their misery. It might be hard at first to get him to agree, but getting him to play a sport with you or something active he normally enjoys will certainly change his mood. Exercise will help him leave everything behind.
Way to cheer him up: You'll probably have to be quite pushy with this one. Get dressed up in your workout gear so that he knows that you're serious and ready. Get out your tennis rackets, your football, or his trainers and demand that he joins you. Let him know that you understand that he doesn't feel up to it but remind him about the rush of feel good chemicals he's going to get when you're done. He'll be able to think more clearly and perhaps become a little more optimistic.
10. Make plans for the future
Talking to him about something in the future will remind him that this difficult time is just temporary. If you can plan something exciting for him to look forward to, it might encourage him to pull himself out of his sadness and deal with it in a positive way. It might not work immediately, but it will help him in the long run.
Way to cheer him up: Plan a trip to somewhere he always wanted to go. You could plan it yourself and surprise him or you could just surprise him with the idea and you can plan it together. Either way, giving him something exciting to think about should help him focus on other areas of his life and remember that there is more to it than the problem he's facing now.
Men can be notoriously difficult to cheer up when they are dealing with a serious problem. You might have tried everything and still not know how to cheer up your boyfriend. Many of the tips above are general and will help anyone that's struggling with a problem. But when it comes to boyfriends, the most important piece of advice is the first one - give him some space. Most men prefer to find solutions to their problems on their own, so trust him to take the time he needs to work through his emotions and make up his mind as to how he wants to move forward. Your job as his girlfriend is simply to be there for him and to patiently support his healing process.