Every girl starts a relationship hoping that it would be the beginning of something fresh and beautiful in her life. She hopes it would be based on love, respect, and understanding. And, finally, that this new relationship would bring joy to her and her partner's life. But this is not always the case. Sometimes, you end up with a person who isn't nice to you and they hurt your emotions because of their meanness. You might not be sure why this is happening because you put in your efforts to make this relationship work. Despite your efforts, your boyfriend doesn't appreciate you and it makes you wonder, "why is my boyfriend so mean?" There can be a number of reasons that can help you understand the issues in your own relationship.
9 Reasons Why Your Boyfriend Is So Mean
Read on the following reasons to get to the root cause and find out how to deal with your relationship issues.
1. He is not serious about this relationship
Sometimes, people do get into relationships just for physical pleasure or to show off to other people. When they do that, they are simply using their partner for their own benefits. They are not really thinking about long-term commitment. If that is the case, your boyfriend will not respect and love you. He will simply stay in the relationship as long as he is entertained or it serves his purposes. That is why he is being angry without any reason or just insults you any time.
If he really doesn't care about you and the relationship, then it's time to either confront him or leave him. It's not possible for a girl to stay with someone who isn't serious about her. You deserve someone who truly loves you and cares about you.
2. He wants attention
If you have been working long hours lately or you are not able to show your affection and care for him, then he might be acting childish or angry to get your attention. Try to think about the real reason behind "why is my boyfriend so mean to me?" Maybe you couldn't spend time together or check on him when he was sick. It doesn't mean that it's your fault. Simply try to take care of him and see that his needs are met. See if your love and care can solve this problem.
3. He is resisting his love for you
Some people think that falling in love is a weakness. So, they start acting mean when they discover that they have developed feelings for their partner. It's usually difficult to convince them that love gives strength and they need to see it in a positive light. Give him a chance and see whether he admits his love for you or keeps on being mean to you. If it doesn't work out, well, then maybe it's time to move on.
4. He does not care about you
If thinking about your mean boyfriend makes you sad, then you might not be with the right person. The thought "why is my boyfriend so mean?" often comes to your mind. Before you decide whether he cares about you or not, think about all the times he hurt your feelings. Did he come to apologize or he never regretted his behavior even a single time? You will know whether he likes you or not by thinking about his overall attitude towards you.
5. He needs his own space
Men want to experience some freedom even when they are in a relationship. Maybe he is trying to convey that he needs his own space by being a little mean or bitter towards you. Don't expect him to spend every free minute with you. He might want to spend time with friends and family or he wants to pursue a new hobby. Whatever he wants, support him instead of worrying about him. Take out time for your own hobbies and interests.
6. He has bad manners
When you start a relationship, you can notice your boyfriend's personality through his manners. If he treats other people around him in a bad way, chances are that this will translate to his behavior towards you. Your boyfriend is mean because he wasn't brought up with good manners. He doesn't know how to treat people with respect. If that is the case, he is not worth your time.
7. Open communication is needed
Relationships always work if there is open communication between the two partners. If his actions or behavior are bothering you, tell him straight up. Maybe he can improve himself or clear out the misunderstandings. When you and your boyfriend will be open with each other, you can take better care of each other.
8. He has an addiction
Substance addiction or addiction of any kind can disturb the mental health of people. They stop caring about important people in their lives and are usually mean to them. If your boyfriend has an addiction of some kind, try to find out about it. If you are patient enough or want to stick around, try convincing him for treatment. Otherwise, don't stay long with a person who can't control his attitude. You might put yourself at risk because such people can even be violent.
9. He is afraid of speaking his mind
When your boyfriend suddenly gets mean and starts pushing you away, maybe he wants to leave you but he is afraid of speaking his mind. Some people are scared of taking the blame when it comes to leaving their partners. So, their mean attitude pushes the other person to break up with them. Mention breaking up in your conversation and notice his reaction. Maybe that's what he wants.
Have an Open Conversation
When your boyfriend is being mean to you, simply don't tolerate it. Have an open conversation about his behavior and ask him why he is doing it. If he didn't notice that he was being mean, tell him how you feel. If he cares about you, he will apologize and try to change himself. But if he doesn't care at all, muster up your courage and try to move on. It will be painful at the moment but know that you deserve to be with someone who treats you with respect and cares about you.