On the one hand, breakups can be sudden and a very impetuously made decision, and on the other, they seem like an only option. After the breakup, however, people get back together and that's completely justified and reasonable at times. After all, people change due to various things that happen to them as time goes by. So it doesn't mean that you and your partner should not get back together after a break. You just have to know that you two will have a lot of things to work on, because it's easy to start a new relationship where you are head over heels for someone, rather than dealing with past problems. Sometimes, it's worth it, though.
Ways to Make Things Right After Getting Back Together
Can you break up and get back together? It is a frequently asked question because almost every person has been in a situation in which they have to find the answer. There are lots of answers, but the choice is on you. Nevertheless, there are some things you should know how to deal with after getting back together after a break.
1. Don't make the same mistakes again
A wise man knows that he is mistaken and that's actually why he's truly wise. Don't let your ego and anger blind you, because making a mistake is a normal thing. Think about your words and actions and try to be as objective as you can. Try to learn from your past mistakes, because you've been given a chance to make things right. If you keep behaving in the same way, you will get the same result, which is heartbreak and breakup. Of course, your partner should do the same. A relationship is a connection between two beings, and if the only one makes effort in it, it will perish. Admit your mistakes and don't let yourselves make them again.
2. Forgive your partner
It seems easy to forgive, but when we are the ones who need to get over something, we become aware that our memories can't be erased selectively, and that simply saying "I forgive you" means nothing. If you are still mad at your partner after deciding to get back together, you will have quarrels again for sure. Suppressing your anger won't help as well, because one day, that anger will find its way to the surface. If you feel like your or your partner's actions are simply unforgivable, you should better break up. You can't get to love them again unless you forgive them and start from the beginning.
3. Leave the past behind you
The only moment that truly exists is here and now, and the past is purely made out of memories. Leave all that behind and start everything from scratch. Don't even think about provoking your partner or trying to rub a mistake they once made on their face. Vengeance is never the answer and, after all, people do change. Both you and your partner are not the same people you were when you were together the previous time. If you really want to make things work, both of you must forget about what happened before. Instead of that, think about all the great things you will be able to achieve now and in the future.
4. Forget about the blame
Who did something wrong shouldn't matter now. The only thing that matters is learning from your mistakes and regretting making them. If you are truly sorry for what happened in the past, that means you've changed. Therefore, if your partner does the same, believe them and give them a second chance. If they screw you over again, that means that they just weren't honest.
5. Trust each other
Unfortunately, there is no other way to believe your partner again unless you give them a second chance. Trust is the most important thing in a relationship, and don't expect that you will be able to promptly trust each other after a breakup. Mutual trust will be built again, but you will have to lower your guard and don't overthink things. Everything will fall into place in time.
6. Communicate more effectively
You will have to talk things out more frequently if any new problems occur. An honest conversation can solve many misunderstandings, but people often try to indirectly express their anger or displeasure and blame their partner for misreading their signals. From where I stand, it's immature and only brings about problems. If you have something to say to your partner, you shouldn't hesitate to do it. Don't bicker or attack your partner instantly if you think his behavior is inappropriate, though.
7. Be patient
You will need to have a lot of patience if you consider getting back together after a break. After all, Rome wasn't built in a day. Therefore, don't expect a perfect relationship immediately after reuniting with your ex. There is still a bit of sorrow and bitterness lingering inside of both of you, so just be patient and let time fix everything. In situations like this, time is your best ally.
8. Work on your personal growth
This time, it will be different than the first time you hooked up. Back then, everything was magical, new, and exciting. Now you have a lot of work to do. It really doesn't sound like an interesting thing to do, but use this opportunity to grow both emotionally and psychologically.
Summary
Getting back together after a break is difficult and you can't expect everything to be perfect instantly. Give yourself time, believe your partner, and don't dwell on your past mistakes. Use this opportunity to become a better person and save a relationship which can actually be really valuable. Don't listen to other people, and don't give up that easily. Everything can be fixed with open communication when two persons are meant for each other.